do posts count if they are like, one-liners?

If they do, I post all the freakin' time! haha! But if not.... well how about suck it 'cause my life ranting isn't for your entertainment! Ok, it is, but only when I feel like it. Two seconds ago, when posting my one-liner regarding the end of my job, I felt like not entertaining more than that. Mostly because that was just all I had to say about the way my job ended. And that's that.

SERIOUSLY CONSIDERING deleting my facebook. But at the same time, it connects me to a lot of people in other areas of the country and even the world, and so I don't want to get rid of it. Instead, I just updated my security and filters and deleted a bunch of people! Woo! woo-ha! That's even better Wu-Tang thanks!!

In the G.Love song, "Lay Down The Law", is he saying Greg or Craig? I wonder.

My mother and I should be, I'm 85% sure, leaving in the next half hour to drive to Issaquah, to get a puppy. A wee wittle German Shepherd/Belgian Mallinois. I think. I'm not saying it for sure until we are on our way and it's ya know, for sure. 

was a pleasure working with you!

would have been a bit better if you had CALLED. Assholes. 

haha! no more no more!

no more bull shit!!!!!

STARTING NOW 

Today is the day!

that I will get off my ass now and  go take care of the horses. and then, I will work on my new years resolutions. 

to brush my hair, or to not brush my hair?

coffee or sugar

or drugs? or alcohol!

I'm feeling happy right now. Earlier today I cried, and then I slept the majority of the day. Then I woke up and almost cried again, but didn't have the energy to. Sometimes I feel like I am fighting a darkness that I can't beat. But other times, I feel like I am on top of the world.

I came to the realization of a few things in the past few days. and I think it's perfect timing; it's the new year soon, and the perfect time to make changes. Time to start thinking of my new years resolution. But for now, I'm going to enjoy music, and brush my hair, so I feel more productive tonight.

I pray that I won't always feel like this. 

I've just realized that now is the time....

now is the time to start making changes in my life. I need to focus on what I will do with my life, what I can do to support myself and support the things I enjoy doing.

I think now is time for me to take special care of my wellbeing. Yoga is a daily-must. I only have one horse now, and I should ride her every day. And I will start taking classes at WCC again, and start my way into psychology. Because I really like psychology, and I think I can make a career out of that someday!!

As for my totally stupid and insane love life (attempted love life), I won't focus on that. It's a bad time for me, seeing as that my own life isn't where I want it just yet. Also, no more fucking, just for the sake of fucking. That's not fair.


Also, I will pray daily. I will become again the witch I once was, and then I will become even more of a witch than that!

To start all that... I think it's time to get a little sleep. 

down to 1 horse

because BooBoo is now Heather's horse! Officially official tomorrow when we sign the bill of sale! 

It's snowing!

I have two other blogs that I never post in, because they actually have topics and that is way too much pressure for me.

the whole night at work I felt like my LOD was weird. Like, usually he is always checking up on me and giving me crap for everything and joking with me and today he barely talked to me at all!! Really not what I wanted, I'm already having a crappy day. I had to take plan B a couple days ago (I know, tmi), and now the moodyness I think is setting in. 'Cause I feel really shitty about myself today, I don't know why. I feel like a slut, I feel ugly and stupid and I can't help but wonder WTF is wrong with me?! Everyone around me has it figured out to some extent, everyone around me at least has found someone to take solace in. And here I am, at 4am, with a gingerbread latte, roses which I bought for myself, a cat, and 8 betas. That's my solace. Not even my horses anymore. And yes, I am taking my vitamin D.


I just don't even care, right now, I just feel like crying.

oh yeah, it's snowing. 

first off, if you have a perfect fucking life,

YOU ARE LYING AND I HATE YOU

quit acting like everything is fuckin dandy when it's not!!!!! ITS ANNOYING.

I'm not saying come to everyone with your bullshit, but don't act all like lala fucking de daw my life is perfect so I'm gonna shove it in everyone's fuckin face because my life is better than them and I'm happier than them

you don't know anyone else..... so shut up!

also, DONT INSULT MY JOB, YOU WORK AT HOLLISTER AND DOLLAR TREE yet you still have to ask me for money????? I enjoy my job and love the people I work with, and I make decent pay, so how about go fuck yourself, loser.


AND I spend all my free time in a barn because horses are way cooler than most people and I AM A PROFESSIONAL EQUESTRIAN it wouldn't make sense for me to be other places all the time!!!!!!!!

"maybe she quit because she was tired of everyone talking to her like she's stupid." says stella~

between a coworker and myself:

"did you have a good time at the mall?"
"no, actually not at all"
"why??"
"didn't you see the guy I was with? serious douche bag, great at making me miserable!"
"uhh, don't hang out with douche bags!!"
"I know, I know. I don't know why I bother."
"did you tell punch him?"
"no, because he's the kind of douche bag who would most likely punch back, and I'm pretty sure he hits harder than me."
"that's all right, you've got plenty of people to kick his ass. I'll kick his ass."
:) :) :) :D :D :D

I love that I am surrounded by people who love me, care for me, and will be there for me no matter what.

I'm very grateful for that!!

let's try to look at each other

what we see is not always real.... we fear that the other may not see what we see....

just come home.

give me something sweet to eat

it's December. The Earth I stand on is frozen.. I am trying to remember that frozen is not dead. Life is just lying in wait.. Stay positive. Do not disappoint. Pray for those you love. When something bad happens to someone you know, comfort and hold them, give them your love and show them you care. When something bad happens to you personally, find your person to comfort and hold and love and care, do not go on your own, do not drink or smoke and do not forget to take your vitamins and keep eating, remember you cannot live off of only coffee. Remember you are not being judged, you are being cared about and fussed over. It is love.

My prayers go out to Blitz/Miles tonight, pray that he makes it through the night and starts to recover. Pray that Elijah's Uncle comes out of critical condition, pray that everyone stays together and stays strong.


You are who you make yourself, life is only as fulfilling as you let it be.

Remember your mother, remember your father and your brother and sister, remember what you strive for, what you live for. Remember love.

Remember love and we will get through the cold.